- NOT REALLY, BUT IT'S FOR MY 18TH.
- AND SHE DID RUN OFF.

WHAT WAS IT YOU WANTED TO SAY?
WAS IT ABOUT MAKING LOVE?

PATRICE SPENDS AN AWFULLY LONG TIME
IN THE SHOWER DOESN'T HE?

REMEMBER... IT'S NOT REAL.

TRY TO GET REALLY DEEP,
RIGHT UP TO THE BALLS.

- SOFTLY SOFTLY, CATCHEE MONKEE.
- I DIDN'T KNOW YOU SPOKE SPANISH.

YOU WOULD TELL ME IF I WAS BEING A DICK?

READY TO PUT ON YOUR DANCING SHOES?
I KNOW I AM!

HE WAS CAUGHT WANKING
OVER THE SCHOOL ORCHESTRA.

- REGRETTABLY, YES.
- I'M TOTALLY FOR REAL.

- JUST AFTER HE MOVED AWAY.
- NO, I NEVER. SHUT UP, YOU KNOB.

IT'S A HAT. OBVIOUSLY. GOD!

OR THE BLOKE HAS REPLANTED
THEM AT SOME EFFORT AND COST.

YOU'RE GOING TO THAT FREAK'S HOUSE?

DAD...

YES I DO, TOTALLY. UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOU,
IT'S NOT THE FIRST WORLD WAR.

- HOW'S THE SEX SEARCH GOING?
- JAY THINKS IT'S HER.

AND YOU'D KNOW BECAUSE YOU'VE
HAD SO MANY BLOW JOBS.

OK, SO THEY'VE GONE, THEN.
THAT'S ACTUALLY HAPPENED.

- IT JUST SMELLS LIKE BEING POOR.
- FUCK OFF!

NO-ONE BETTER FIND OUT ABOUT THIS.

IN CASE YOU'RE INTERESTED,
AT MY OLD SCHOOL THE DAY BEGAN

I'VE GOT TO GET TO GOLF, I'VE GOT SEVEN
MISSED CALLS, MY DAD WILL GO MENTAL.

THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT SAFE SEX,
COS YOU CAN'T GET IT UP.